Guest blogger, MSM reporter Todd Unctuous reports on the Presidential Nobel Peace Prize.

The wonderful news is published this week that President Barack Obama is this year’s winner of the Nobel Peace Prize. This prestigious prize, created by the inventor of dynamite, has been awarded for President Obama’s ‘extraordinary accomplishments’ in the realm of world peace. Acclamations and congratulations from world leaders have been flowing into the White House, among those congratulating the President is the distinguished former president and elder statesman, Fidel Castro.
Critics of the President have pointed out that the nominations for the peace prize closed just two weeks after he was inaugurated as President, and they question what exactly he had accomplished by then. One cynical observer commented that “The President’s triumph as Nobel Prize winner should give encouragement to all community organizers who work for ACORN, for now their own accomplishments might win them a prestigious international prize worth 1.4 million dollars.” Another cynic has cynically said, “If Obama deserves the Nobel peace prize, so does every Miss America contestant who babbles on about ‘world peace.'”

The second comment is ridiculous. It is obvious that the President has never been a contestant in the Miss America pagaent. Let me confront the first sarcastic remark head on: First of all, this comment is clearly racist. The President’s work as a community organizer was with the African American community and therefore any attack on ‘community organizers’ is an attack on all African American citizens. Beneath this vicious racist attack is a misunderstanding of the exact nature of the President’s accomplishments. It is true that the nominations closed just two weeks after he took office, but by then he had already set the stage for the great accomplishments which he has already accomplished. Through his stirring rhetoric he turned a country that had drifted into cynicism back to a country of hope. He turned a despairing ‘No we Can’t’ people into a thriving, positive and peace loving, ‘Yes We Can!’ people. Through the inspiring leadership of his political campaign he lifted the hearts of people around the world who had become very anti-American because of the stupidity of the Bush family to a people who once more look to America as the kind, generous and peace-loving leaders of the free world. Once more the poor and ignorant people of the world (most of whom are negroes) are able to lift their heads high with hope.
Never mind the technicality that the President was nominated for the award due to his great accomplishments only two weeks after he occupied the White House. Worrying about details like this is just nit-picking. Instead let us consider the great accomplishments for world peace he has already accomplished. First of all he has promised to withdraw our troops from Iraq, and although this has not yet happened, he has inspired many people with his honest and forthright intentions. Next, he has has promised to continue the search for peace in Afghanistan by increasing the numbers of our young men and women who are engaged in that conflict. We must understand that these men and women of our ‘armed services’ should be seen as ‘peace keepers.’ They are not there to occupy Afghanistan, but to eliminate those who would destroy peace. In order to appease a resurgent Russian empire, the President has offered to dismantle our nuclear weapons. This is a bold and courageous step towards peace. Next, let us consider the President’s accomplishments elsewhere in the world. He wants there to be peace in the Middle East. This is a great accomplishment. He has travelled to Africa and spoken about peace. This is a great accomplishment. He has allowed the leader of Iran to publicly deny the holocaust and speak at the United Nations. The President’s efforts at dialogue and listening to the peace loving Muslim peoples is a great and wonderful step forward. This is a President of peace. We can almost hear him leading throngs of people holding candles and singing the stirring anthem of our time, “All we are asking is ‘give peace a chance.'”
Finally, let us consider his efforts at peace at home. The President constantly speaks of the need for listening, dialogue and ‘finding common ground.’ He is clearly a man who is passionate for peace. For example, in the first few months of his heroic leadership he has reached out to his opponents on the issue of abortion and sought common ground and a means of compromise. His efforts have been rebuffed. They will not compromise. He has reached out to Catholics by very kindly agreeing to receive an honorary doctorate and speak at their premier university. He has even appointed a Catholic to the Supreme Court. His hand of peace has been rebuffed.
As a result, the time has come for this peace loving President to get tough. He needs to pursue his policies without compromise. He needs to work for peace by weeding out all those who would cause division. I am thinking of those who wish to push their own religious convictions down the throats of others. These are the real enemies of peace–whether they are the Taliban in Afghanistan, the Al Queda terrorists around the world, or our own home grown variety–all those religious bigots and zealots– the fundamentalists (both Catholic and Protestant) who would murder and maim to promote their religion.
Our peace loving President needs to wage war on those who would stand in his way and crush them without mercy. This is the only way for true peace to reign in our world.
Todd Unctuous is forty two. For more information on Todd Unctuous go here.