News reports from Jerusalem are just breaking about an astounding discovery outside the city. In an ancient tomb an ossuary has been uncovered with the inscription “Rabbi Jeshua Nazarene”. The bones seem to indicate marks of a crucifixion–with the skull having holes caused by the crown of thorns.

French Archeologist Dr Avril Primera said, “We cannot be certain, but it would seem that these may really be the bones of Jesus of Nazareth.” The ossuary dates from the early second century and the bones were wrapped carefully in purple rayon to indicate special–perhaps royal status.”

If the new find really proves to be the remains of Jesus of Nazareth it would, of course, put the entire foundation of the Christian faith in jeopardy.

The Vatican has issued a brief press release suspending judgment until further tests can be carried out.

Noted Italian journalist Antonio Scrofulous said, “I spoke to Pope Francis yesterday when were having a cappuccino and he said, “Trust me. The whole resurrection thing is a myth. Someday they will find his bones.”

The Right Rev Basil Fawlty– Anglican bishop of Torquay commented, “This does not affect our faith at all. It is still a wonderful miracle that the beautiful teachings of Jesus continued to be believed by his disciples even after his tragic death. This is, after all, is it not, the true meaning of “resurrection”?–that in some way we are all remembered by those we love?”

Famous atheist Fred Nitchy said, “God is dead. I told you so!”

Meanwhile New Testament scholar Bart Simpson commented, “So Jesus really existed after all! Well I’ll be darned.”

Please note the date of publication and that the archeologist is named Dr Avril Primera (April First)