One of the most common things I hear in the confessional is people confessing impatience and anger. But are impatience and anger a sin? We often confess things that make us feel unhappy about ourselves–things that mar our self image. Some of these failures are sins, but not all of them. For it to be a sin your will needs to be engaged. You have to have chosen to do wrong and impatience, by definition is not intentional. Being angry is not willed.

An important Bible verse is in Ephesians: “Be angry but sin not.” In other words, it is not a sin to be angry. However in Ephesians we also find the verse, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger.” In other words, being angry is not a sin, but bearing a grudge is. This is the difference: bearing a grudge, carrying resentment, planning revenge–all of these things fall under the category of the deadly sin of wrath. Wrath is engaging the will with the anger. Being impatient isn’t a sin. Acting on the anger is.

When ordinary anger and impatience turns to wrath it becomes a burning furnace of resentment and rage within. We soon fall into what I call “the resentment loop” in which we go over and over in our mind the grievance we have suffered. We plan what to say to that person. We plan evil against them. We plot to destroy them.

Wrath is, obviously  a deadly sin because the ultimate form of acting on the anger is to harm or kill another person. However, wrath is also deadly to the wrathful person because harboring resentment and hatred toward another poisons one’s own mind and soul and this leads to spiritual deadness, but may also actually (because of accumulated stress) lead to physical illness and death.

Furthermore, when we nurture wrath in our hearts we are nurturing hatred and that becomes infectious. The person nursing a grudge and harboring resentment will invariably share their feelings with others and soon he hatred spreads and a toxic atmosphere develops and poisons the whole family, community and the wider world. When the wrath is shared with a group they become activists–spreading the discontent, provoking responses and spreading the wrath and this leads to violence and unrest.

The antidote to the deadly sin of wrath is forgiveness and charity. Charity or Divine Love–desires the best for the other person. Wrath wants them dead. Charity and forgiveness are not attained by self discipline or a sincere attempt at loving and forgiving. This can only be attained through a supernatural infusion of grace.