I was received into the full communion of the Catholic Church over thirty years ago. I had been brought up in a conservative fundamentalist home, became and Anglican, went to Oxford to study theology, was ordained and served in the Church of England for fifteen years before “coming home to Rome.”

I then worked for seven years with a Catholic charity that assisted convert clergy. After returning to the USA to be ordained some twenty years ago I have been friends with, and helped many Protestants to make the journey to the Catholic faith–not least of which my main family members.

In these years I have noticed how many converts make the step into the Catholic Church, and before long they are disillusioned, disgruntled and disagreeable. Some dislike Pope Francis, or they find the Catholic Church has a political slant with which they disagree or they get upset over a liberal priest or prelate, over liturgical abuse, financial corruption of immorality amongst the clergy.

Too often they then go on to grumble, gripe and groan pretty much non stop on social media. They set up dissenting websites or they launch a YouTube channel that dishes dirt on the bad bishops, compromising priests, heterodox theologians, Father Fabulous and Sister Sandals.

In years past I have not been innocent in these matters myself.

So what’s the problem? It is complicated, but I think it comes down to something I have named “denominationalism” To define this mouthful I would say it is the abiding underlying assumptions we had when we were members of a non-Catholic denomination. Part of the underlying assumption is that one shops for the church of one’s choice. Once a Catholic we put this aside. We’ve “come home” there is no place else to go. Or so we think–or so we think we think–or so we want to think we think.

But the shadow of denominationalism haunt us. Its there deep down and this is what make us unhappy Catholics. We knew we were not looking for the perfect church, but we still had that lingering hope that in finding the Catholic faith we had found just that. And what, for the denominationalist is the perfect church? It is a church that we agree with theologically sure. But within denominationalism as I have often observed, the divisions are also along socio-economic, cultural and ethnic lines. The denominationalist joins the church he likes not only theologically, but he also likes the people. They have good “fellowship”. He likes and respects the pastor because they’re from the same social class, educational background, race and culture. They share the same politics with the people in their church. Lefties to the lefty liberal Protestant churches, Right wingers to the conservative Protestant churches. When I say this is “deep down” in the denominationalist’s mindset–it is part of what he thinks a church should be.

But then he becomes a Catholic and finds fellow Catholics who are from the other end of the political spectrum. He finds Catholics who are different racially, socially, educationally and economically. His denominationalism is busted wide open. Now he is in the universal church which, I should point out, is NOT just another denomination.

It is the Body of Christ alive by the power of the Holy Spirit and it is ummm-CATHOLIC–universal. It’s bigger than a denomination, bigger than a political point of view, bigger than an ethnic group, a socio economic club or a mutually affirming theological hug-fest.

As such it should challenge us–push us outside the box–make us listen to others. What I hope I have learned these thirty years as a Catholic is to listen to my fellow Catholics with whom I instinctively disagree or dislike. I want to find what’s good about them. What they believe sincerely and hope for with open hearts. After all, we’re in this together and it’s not a bad thing to make friends with your fellow travelers. It makes the hardships of the pilgrimage a bit easier to bear.